Like too-many millions of other Americans, my family and I have experienced the financial crisis as something more real than merely a cascade of gloomy newspaper headlines. My job was eliminated last year a few days before Thanksgiving, and the months since have been a slow, disillusioning slog, hunting scarce jobs as the economy wobbled and dipped, like a child’s gyroscope winding down.
Thankfully, my own sentence to downsized limbo now looks to be ending. Here’s what I’ve learned during the last eight months:
- If you have a job presently, make sure you back up important examples of your work—the stuff you’re proudest of—onto your personal flash drive frequently. I can’t say this too much: back up, back up, back up! These days, when the ax falls, it falls quickly and unmercifully, and you could find yourself forever locked out of your office computer and bounced to the pavement, without any chance to grab examples of the work you did for your now-former employer. (This didn’t happen to me, but to my former boss. It wasn’t pretty.)
- If you get the chop, it’s okay to be upset, but be civil and professional toward the HR apparatchik who delivers the bad news. It’s not personal. As Tessio says in The Godfather, “Tell Mike it was only business, I always liked him.” Staying on HR’s good side is important: They’ll be much more likely to grant you small favors while you negotiate your severance if you don’t act like a jerk.
- As soon as you hit the street, get some new business cards reflecting your new independent-contractor status. Nothing expensive or fancy, just something to remind people how to reach you. Check out Vistaprint.com.
- Don’t bother applying for any job advertised on Craigslist. Your chance of getting a response from a prospective employer is considerably less than the odds of spotting Pope Benedict XVI getting the special lap dance at Scores on Easter Sunday. Don’t waste your time.
- Likewise, ignore premium job sites like TheLadders.com that require you to pay up-front to see their listings, as well as services that offer to shoot your resume out to hundreds of headhunters for a fee. Zero results: Not worth it. Husband your cash.
- The Web is fueling a race to the bottom when it comes to freelance fees. One Utah-based outfit contacted me about writing Websites for small businesses. The pay: $.03 per word. That’s right: three pennies! (I declined their munificent offer.)
- If you’re a finalist for a job and you don’t grab the brass ring, be gracious, positive, and thank the hiring manager for the opportunity. Express interest in any future positions that might open up, and then stay in touch. If their first choice doesn’t work out, they might come back to you quickly without restarting the interview process. This actually happened to me.
- It’s true: Wine will get you through times of no job, better than a job will get you through times of no wine. ‘Nuff said.
Brave New Whirl 